The Time A One-Armed Baseball Team Took On A One-Legged Baseball Team

Back in olden times, novelty barnstorming baseball teams were all the rage. While squads of all women, all Asians, and all blacks were popular, maybe no game was as indelibly memorable as the Snorkeys vs. the Hoppers: the former, a team of one-armed players; the latter, a collection of one-legged opponents. » 11/26/14 3:13pm Wednesday 3:13pm

Manchester City's Messiah Sergio Agüero Pulls Another Resurrection Act

Twenty minutes into Manchester City's crucial home Champions League match against Bayern Munich on Tuesday, it looked like everything had broken right for the English champions. Earlier in the day, in the other matchup in City's group, Roma somehow contrived to draw a game they really should've won, greatly expanding… » 11/26/14 1:27pm Wednesday 1:27pm

David Moyes Doesn't Know Who His New Players Are

I'd cut David Moyes—who's just moved to a foreign country with a foreign language for a new job in a new league—some slack here, as "Stefano" isn't too far off from "Esteban," but then I think, What if Steve Kerr showed up to practice calling his point guard "Steven" Curry? » 11/25/14 12:50pm Tuesday 12:50pm

Zinedine Zidane No Longer Has To Pretend Not To Coach Team He Coaches

A couple months ago, we told you about how Zinedine Zidane, manager of Real Madrid Castilla, was under investigation for not having the proper coaching qualifications. The Frenchman had two ways to fight the impending punishment: either cadge up the qualifications or deny that he was actually the manager. Lo and… » 11/21/14 1:29pm 11/21/14 1:29pm

Xabi Alonso Forced To Apologize To Ronaldo For Stupid, Fake Controversy

Remember that dumb story Real Madrid pitched to their stooges at Marca yesterday, where some milquetoast statements of Xabi Alonso's were folded, kneaded, and ultimately transformed into direct insults to former teammates Cristiano Ronaldo and Iker Casillas? Well, it worked. » 11/21/14 11:44am 11/21/14 11:44am

Shitty Swiss Team Cuts 11 Players After Youth Team Blows Them Out 10-0

FC Grenchen, of Switzerland's fourth division, suck at soccer. In their last nine matches, they've collected all of zero points while shipping 66—yes, 66—goals, 10 of which came at the feet of FC Luzern's youth squad. Following that horrific result, Grenchen's sporting director decided to cut 11 players. » 11/20/14 6:30pm 11/20/14 6:30pm

Meet Marca, The Hilarious Propaganda Arm Of Real Madrid

It's maybe a little difficult for Americans to grasp just how deeply and blatantly in the tank the European press can be for the local XI. And no one is deeper and more blatantly in the tank for the local XI than the media in Spain, where the local XI means either Barcelona and Real Madrid and where the address of the… » 11/20/14 1:58pm 11/20/14 1:58pm

French Club Suspected Of Bribing Opponents With Cases Of Wine Mid-Match

French officials have arrested the club presidents of newly promoted Ligue 1 side Caen and Ligue 2 club Nîmes for their suspected involvement in fixing a match at the end of last year's Ligue 2 season. What did the Caen players receive for their services? According to one report, cases of wine delivered at halftime. » 11/18/14 5:05pm 11/18/14 5:05pm

Despots, Serial Killers, And Dick Jokes: Football Manager's Banned Names

From the sheer number of funny names assigned to the randomly generated players in Football Manager, you may have assumed there is no filter on name combinations. And while you may have seen a "Willy Pinas" or two, you haven't seen a "Adolf Hitler," "Tim McVeigh," or a "Dick Licka" for a good reason. » 11/17/14 12:06pm 11/17/14 12:06pm

Argentine Club President Runs Up In Players' Homes 40 Deep, Robs Them

Jorge Abib is the club president of Argentina's Textil Mandiyú. He is insane. Why, just last night, multiple Textil players accused a possibly drugged-up Abib of rolling up to the players' apartment building with around 40 club ultras, busting into dozens of rooms, and breaking everything in sight while demanding the… » 11/14/14 6:07pm 11/14/14 6:07pm

Chart: The Average Player Salaries In Soccer Leagues Around The World

A lot of what we talk about when we compare different soccer leagues, from arguing which one's the best to which one's the deepest and even which plays the most attractive style, comes down to how much money is spent on players. In that sense, this Sportsmail chart listing the average salaries of players in 34 leagues… » 11/14/14 1:20pm 11/14/14 1:20pm

MLS Is Still Pissed Off At Jürgen Klinsmann

It was obvious at the time that MLS commissioner Don Garber's tirade against Jürgen Klinsmann last month was about much more than the innocuous statements they were ostensibly in response to. Sure enough, ESPN FC is reporting that MLS bigwigs remain "irate" at Klinsmann—this time for what they see as his pushiness in… » 11/14/14 12:19pm 11/14/14 12:19pm

Chelsea And Spain Are Locked In A Dumb War Neither Can Win

Even by the standards of dick-measuring contests, the one ongoing between Chelsea and the Spanish national team has been awful for months. At some point, though, this sort of thing stops being merely dumb and threatens to become actually harmful to the players each side should be trying to protect—and we're nearing… » 11/13/14 5:30pm 11/13/14 5:30pm